Godsend

Robert DeNiro, Greg Kinnear, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos

Lions Gate, 2004

Kid dies at 8 yrs old/parents move to isolated New England community where Doctor clones cells/voila! boy back - life good, until clone turns 8, then strange things start happening - cloneboy freaks out - sees things, hears voices, dreams/visions of some other child (about same age) who's one of those "firestarters" (a la Damien!!)

Maybe I wasn't paying attention enough but it didn't seem like it was as well developed as it couldhave been - all the moral/psychological issues that could have been explored were not. Perhaps that is left for us to infer, but really it never seemed to get that deep.

SPOILER ALERT!

The only thing I particularly liked (because it was a surprise . . . to me, that is. If I'd've been paying attention I probably wouldn't have been) was the Doctor (DeNiro) character turning out to be cracked himself, i.e. cloning his OWN son in THIS kid, in order to have a "part" of him back, even though his own son was a sicko-psycho-killer-bratmonster . . . and in a way, the good doc turned out to be one as well.

Story of course ends with us never knowing if "good cloneboy" is or is not taken over by psychoboy. Left for us to figure out.

That is, if we really care.

VG

Rollerball

MGM 2002 withLL Cool J and Rebecca Romijn-Stamos

action film involving underground gaming that becomes more and more violent to suit the tastes of the bloodthirsty audience, which of course lines the pockets of the Russians who run the whole thing. Basically it's another movie that makes the Russians look like complete heartless villains, and it would be interesting to see this movie in a sort of "near-future" format, in which a computerized network already mostly rules the world, but then - that's been done as well.

Yup - this type of movie's been done before - a good example would be XXX with Vin Diesel.

It's OK, though. Not much more to be said for that.

VG

The Transformers

2007

I have a theory that I'm trying out: there are certain films that need to be seen on the big screen, and some that need to be seen at home. Basically, blockbuster adventure movies with giant machines and even bigger explosions: big screen. Anything else: like your animated movies or tearjerkers: home.

This one: big screen.

I knew that going in, from the previews. My only hope was that the previews would not have showed ALL the action that there was going to be in the movie (which sometimes happens); instead - pleasant surprise! Action throughout.

Two things: if you go in looking for plot or true characterization or anything resembling "reality" - then don't. If you want to see giant metal aliens destroying a city with their mega-fights and action so fast that your eyes get blurry, then this is definitely a winner.

Second thing: my eldest boy didn't like it based on the fact that he has a strong background in Transformers lore and after the movie launched into a detailed list about the "faults" in the movie, i.e. characters' names changed, minor characters subsituted for major characters, series surprises revealed too early, etc. However, I had not steeped myself too deeply in the Transformers canon before this movie, so I was not burdened by such a "purist" mentality. Don't get me wrong, I respect the "purists" because I am one about my specific things (for example, the current CG re-rendering of the original Star Trek series sends me into such fits that I can't even look at Star Trek sites anymore because I'll inadvertently read something about it!) I'm simply observing that sometimes the enjoyment of a version of a story may be enhanced if you see it without any preconceived notions about it.

Note to self: expound theory that film enjoyed as art is as much as what we bring to it as the film itself. Actually this is applied to all art, and has been explored in literature and in painting/photography. Perhaps needs to be further explored in film.)

Or, instead of thinking so much, you can just go see Transformers and watch a bunch of robots beat the crap out of each other, which is EXTREMELY COOL!!

VG

Urban Legends: Bloody Mary

Kind of a variation from the other Urban Legends, which, as I recall, was a human killing kids on campus in the style of common urban myths, this one is about the rather p'o'ed spirit of a girl killed 35 years prior to the current events of the movie.

Interesting note: the guy dying in the tanning booth by being burned to a crisp . . . reminded me of Final Destination 3 in which both girls were sizzled by being electrocuted in tanning booths. I don't think I'm going to go to a tanning salon anytime soon. Truly.

Film seemed to take a lot of inspiration from The Grudge. Makes this one, stylistically, definitely a product of its time.

All in all, if you want to see a teen horror movie with a little gore but not overly much, this one's a safe bet. (and to elevate my status as "film critic" I will elucidate by saying that this film is "safe" in that it does nothing truly new or adventurous, either by way of story, plot, or effects)

VG

The Amityville Horror (2006)

Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, MGM/Dimension Films, 2006

I know, I know, I generally hate remakes as well because I figure if they can't create an original story then why waste the money? right? However, this is a nicely woven tale full of shocks, and yes it does rely on some of the more contemporary horror movie tactics (such as the sharp cutaways and the images of physically tortured souls) as well as using the images that made the first movie so great (such as the voice "gheeet outt!!" and the blood dripping from the walls) -

and yes, you WILL have to get past Van Wilder slowly going down the drain. I myself kept expecting him to pop open a keg and host a frat party, but once you get past that, it's OK.

Some of the detractors will of course lock onto the fact that it does seem like a remake of The Shining, which it is, and as for me the only plot development that didn't sit well with me is the fact that he turned SO FAST. I mean, he's a nice stepdad in minute 5 but by minute 15 into the film you can see how he's going to start chopping away with the axe - yous just don't know when he's going to break but you absolutely are assured that he will. OErhaos that worked a littel too quickly for my tastes, but then again, what else should I expect for a story told in 118 minutes, right?

All in all, it's not the greatest, but by far not the worst, it gets pretty well up there as far as horror movies go, and the strength is that it stayed away from sheer gore.

VG

Final Destination 3

New Line Cinema, 2006

As down as I am on the gorefest that have become standard horror movie fare these days, I have to admit (if I haven't before) that I extremely enjoy the Final Desitination movies, this one no exception. I like them basically because the "monster" isn't a tangible freak in a mask or some CG animated villian, but rather an intangible force, that could be named Fate or Karma as easily as Death.

And, in this movie, as in the other two, I found myself saying out loud, "Death, man, you gots yo'sef one wicked sense of humour!"

[NOTE: couldn't access the alternate endings ("change the fate of the characters") on this particular DVD, which was a slight letdown, but I mention it here as a good example of interesting storytelling, that is - by allowing the viewer to change the possible ending they are "bringing you into the storytelling" process, so to speak, which is not only a relatively new concept but also an ancient construct, that is, from folklore, when stories were handed down through the oral tradition, those who took them to other parts were able to embellish upon the retelling, and even adapt them to suit their audiences. Thus, the alternate endings of Final Destination 3 is actually an homage to the millenia-old tradition of what I call "fluid storytelling."]

Remember that note, kids, it'll be on the final exam at the end of the semester!

VG